SO ready

This is Hubs & I at the beach two years ago:

See how happy we are?  The carefree smiles?  The lack of worry lines or cell phones or worrying about our students?

That'll be us in one short week.  Woo-freaking-hoo!

I've been slowly suffocating under piles of work, prep for summer, laundry, running around and to-do lists.  Next Friday, I get to unearth myself from all of that and leave it behind without a care in the world.

Some of you may doubt my ability to actually not work for a week straight.  But I will say that if there's one thing I do better than being a workaholic, it's being lazy.  Trust me, that oxymoron works in my world.  :)

Worship

We had a worship night for the high school students last night, and it's still ringing in my ears.  Images of bare feet with shoes scattered all over.  Sounds of so many off-key voices wrought with emotion as they professed truth.  The feel of sweaty arms wrapped around my shoulders as we swayed together.  The feeling of joyful freedom as I was able to proclaim beautiful things about my God.

We had a time of prayer, centered on God being our refuge.  I told the kids that when someone enters into a safe refuge, they leave behind the things of the war.  So we prayed individually about what those things were that we needed to leave behind as we ran into the arms of our Refuge.  Then, they wrote those things on a canvas (I'll get a picture at the office tomorrow - it is so beautiful for so many reasons) as a symbol of leaving them.

My word?  Well, I had three.  Because I could just never be that simple.  "My own desires" is what I ended up writing.  Sometimes I want the things that I want so much that I've not stopped to say "Your will be done, not mine".  And it's not bad things that I am wanting, but sometimes we can be tempted away from the great by the good.  And sometimes I don't desire good things.  Sometimes, all I want is for people to notice me and tell me I'm pretty and think I'm awesome.  Sometimes, I want a pair of new shoes more than I want for God to be telling His story in my life. 

Ouch.  That hurt to write. 

But it's not going to change until I start recognizing where my heart is at.  Too many times I have declared myself to be ok when I needed to run to God my Refuge.  Too many times I have not thought I was self-sufficient and not in need of anyone's help, let alone the God of the universe.  Shame on me. 

I told the kids last night that worship is just as much about recognizing who we are as it is who God is.  Because when we recognize who we are, what our hearts are like, then it makes the truth of who God is that much more beautiful.  Because even in our cruddyness, He chooses us.  He wants to enter into this life.  He doesn't just say "Run to me", but He runs toward us. 

"And I'll stand
With arms high and heart abandoned
In awe
Of the One who gave it all
I'll stand
My heart Lord, to You surrendered
All I am is Yours"
~The Stand, by Hillsong United

iPhone

That's right, I saved my pennies and am the proud new owner of the only, the glorious, the oh-so-pretty iPhone 4.

I was hesitant to upgrade from my trusty enV 3.  I wasn't sure that I wanted to be THAT connected to the world.  My work email will now notify me every day and every night.  I'll be able to check Facebook 24/7.  Plus, there was the cost.  Ever since I got back from Haiti, I calculate every purchase in the number of days it would take the average Haitian to earn that money.

Needless to say, this wasn't an easy decision to make.  But our monthly bill hasn't changed, and I know that I'll be able to use my new powers for good.

Like my Bible app.  I'm really stinking excited about my Bible app.  And I also found a keep-track-of-what-you-eat app that kept me from raiding the candy drawer at church today.  That alone is worth getting work emails on a Saturday.

Now if only I could figure out how to make it do my dishes...

Argh

So about a week ago, I added all these sweet tabs (ok, I was excited about them, but there has been no confirmation of their actual sweetness), and now they are gone.  Poof.  Kaput.  Squooshed.  Squelshed.

I have no idea why they disappeared or how.

So I apologize for the de-awesomeifying of my blog, and I'll continue trying to re-awesome it.

There Are Days I Hate My Job

This week, we are sending out our hire letters for our summer camp, and it's one of the least favorite parts of my job.  Our camp hires around 100 high school and college students to be day camp leaders for our church's summer program.  It's 3 weeks of high-intensity awesomeness.

But this week, I have the undesirable job of letting a few students know that they haven't been chosen.  Sometimes, we just have too many applicants.  Sometimes, they're not mature enough to handle a team of small children.  Sometimes, they have no clue who Jesus is and are therefore not great canidates to teach kids about Him.

Each of these letters breaks my heart.  Many of these kids have been looking forward to working at camp since they were campers.  Many of them have friends who will be working at camp this summer.  Many of them have very angry, protective parents who will be even more disappointed than their kids (these parents also have my phone number...yay.)

I know it's just a few students.  And I know that we are trying to make decisions based on what will be best for our campers.  But each letter still breaks my heart.  I agonized over these decisions, double checking applications and interviews.  We prayed before we made these decisions, and we prayed during, and, heck, I'm still praying.

This week, I really hate my job.

Good For My Soul

There are lots of things that are good for my soul, and I've gotten to experience a few of them this week.

1 - Making a little kid belly laugh.  Most notably, my boss's 3 year old daughter.  She has the best belly laugh.  She also walks around with her back arched and her belly out most of the time, which is just so freaking adorable.

2 - Time with Hubs.  This last week has been rough with being sick, trying to get caught up at church and trying to get over the reverse culture shock from coming back to America from Haiti.  Oh yeah, and did I mention that Hubs has been doing contracting in the morning, teaching in the afternoon/evening and trying to finish up his Master's classes?  Yesterday was such a gift.  Because of Mother's Day, we had no student ministry stuff going on in the evening, and we got to come home after church and STAY HOME.  Such a beautiful thing.  Plus it was gorgeous outside.  And Hubs made dinner, plus soup for tonight.  We got to hang out, and he taught tried to teach me how to chip golf balls.  We got to play, eat a meal together, hang out and I even cut his hair.  It was such a nice break.

3 - Having friends that live near me.  Hubs talked me into going out to eat on Friday, and by the wonders of Facebook, we got to share that meal with 4 other couples.  Had we tried to plan it, it never would have worked, but thank you spontaneity!  It's just nice to have friends that live near us to be able to do stuff like that with.  So many of my close friends live at least an hour or more away, and being able to meet up with them is a precious experience that we don't get enough of.  But we now have other young adult couples that we can hang out with, and it's just nice knowing that there is a community here that we're a part of.

4 - A clean house.  I love it when the laundry is caught up with, the floors are clean and the sink is empty of dishes.  None of those things are true yet, but hopefully they will be later on today.  My theory is that if I keep telling myself how lovely it will feel when it's done, then it'll be easier to get through the part where I actually have to clean. 

5 - A sunny, beautiful day.  It's finally warm and sunny outside, which is making #4 all that much more difficult to accomplish.  But the sunshine is so nice, and we haven't really had much of it this spring, so I might go take advantage of the warmth first before I try to accomplish anything.  :)

Oh Yeah, We Got Married

Hubs and I just celebrated our first anniversary, and I totally missed on blogging about it.  Probably because our anniversary fell on Easter, and I was in Haiti.  So, I think you can forgive me.

I loved every aspect of our wedding.  Every part of it was pretty intentional and we tried to reflect two things. 

1) Jesus is the only reason this marriage was happening, let alone going to work

2) Weddings are a party, and parties should be fun!

The ceremony was my favorite part - we chose every song, I made a multi-page program that had games, fun facts and explained a lot of the special parts.  My favorite part of the ceremony?  We took communion together and prayed.

We also threw out a lot of stuff that didn't make sense to us - like making our bridesmaids and groomsmen stand the whole time.  I've been there - you can't see anything, and you always feel like you're going to fall over and ruin the whole ceremony.  Or maybe that's just me.  Plus, both of my sister-in-laws had just given birth, and my other two bridesmaids were pregnant.

Then, we partied.  Hubs and I didn't have champagne - we think it's gross.  So we had Yuengling beer in our custom engraved pint glasses.  I danced, Hubs had a cigar.  We had a caricaturist and a photo station with props.

All in all, it was a beautiful day and the last year has been one of the best of my life.  Living life with Hubs has taught me so much about God, faith and love.

Plus, take a look at this handsome man - so stinking hot!  (sorry, Mom)

Thank you God for this man, this love, this marriage.  And the wedding wasn't bad, either.

How To Be Productive on a Sick Day

Materials needed:

plenty of hot tea
good, entertaining yet slightly mindless TV, preferably instantly streaming sans commercials
drugs, lots of drugs - I'm rocking Tylenol Severe Cold & Sinus
comfy sweatpants, slippers optional
easy access to snacks - I recommend dry cereal


Step one: load up on medicine

Step two: do one small chore, like the dishes or load up the washer with laundry.  Small chores not only give you a sense of accomplishment, but keep you from getting too tired in the meantime.

Step three: watch an episode of TV while drinking tea.  TV is the key - movies are too long to get anything done between them.

Repeat steps two and three until it's time to do step one again


Hopefully, by the end of the day, I'll feel better and the house will be clean.  Hopefully.